Thursday, August 30, 2007

this message is for hui yun:
if u dun believe me,it's ok...i realli control my feelings n trying to hold back my tears.i actually dun wan to cry cos i afraid dat the whole class would think dat it's your fault.but when ms tay tok to me...i just can't control it...I NEVA WAN OTHERS TO THINK THAT YOU R THE 1 HU MAKE ME CRY...i oso didn't tell them much...i dun wanna you to die...cos i will cry for you...n i cry,is not just bcoz of you...but oso my family...lyk you...i have been telling you dat my mom is taking sides wif my sister...n since dat dae we(my mom n i) quarrelled,we haf not been toking...n dat's why my dad scolded me which makes me think i'm unwanted!n cos dat u dun understand how i feel in my family cos i neva tell u much bout dat,so u dun noe...

i wanna sae sry for making yourself thinking dat u r unwanted n being treated as a criminal...seriously,i was very worried bout u todae cos this morning,stella told me dat u were scolded by your parents,which makes me feel very bad...i dun wan u to get hurt...i'm not kicking you around...i just dunnoe wad to do...it's bcoz i'm a councillor n thus,i oways go wif stella...ya,n i admit dat it's my fault...but i dun wan u to be left alone...lyk wad mr lau saes this morning,every1 got their rights to make frens...i blame myself for stopping you to make frens n asking u to stick wif me...so i'm sry...but later,i realised dat u have to make frens n u have the rights,i dun stop u n allowing you to go wif them as well...cos i can't stick wif you the whole dae,i'm in HCL,n u r in CL...i admit dat u shld make frens so dat u can go wif them when i got councillor duties or during chinese lessons...i'm jealous...i'm afraid dat other ppl willl snatch you away...i'm selfish...this is my fault...i sympathise u cos i noe dat nobody understand you,including your family n me,myself...i tried my very best to noe more bout u...i realli hope dat i can be your best fren,not just best fren,is a very close 1...do u understand?

yea...i cried partly cos of mr lau n u...if u can rmb,it was on wed when we were having art lessons...i sat wif stella cos we both wanted to hear chinese songs n yes,i did angry wif you...but i neva want to avoid you...but mr lau saes sumthing which makes me think that it's my fault...but mayb he's right in some way...for you...i just dunnoe wad can we tok about...dat's why i went dere to sit wif stella...so i dun blame you...i got tell michelle dat i'm afraid dat if i cry,which will make them think dat it's your fault...i feel bad..i feel guilty...i wanna sae sry...u sure u wanna end this frenship...?

tmr, we will be having camp,i dun wish dat it's a unmeaningful camp...i dun wan us to feel awkward when seeing each other...dat's why i'm here to sae sry...i will tell the whole class dat it's not your fault to make me cry...i have taken out the first step...if u still decided to end this frenship,den i got nothing to sae cos i realli dun noe wad am i supposed to do....

hui yun,you can blame me,but dun blame mr lau(frenster comment)...cos the problem lies on me...u blame him...but actalli he's the 1 hu helping us to bring us back together...u carn blame him...if u wan,u can blame me...no matter wad u wan me to do...i will abide...u dun get angry wif him...actually mr lau treated every student equally...he's not being biased...it's not your fault,not his fault,but is mine...u dun be so upset...if u wan me to kneel down n beg you for forgiveness,seriously,i'm willing to do it for our frenship's sake...

this message is for mr lau...
mr lau,if u read my blog,i wanna sae thx n sry...
thx is for all your supporting,all your concern,all your helps,n explaining things to me...u felt upset,which makes me feel realli guilty...i noe dat u have been wasting your tym,your money n have been doing a lot of things for us.u r trying to solve the problem but bcoz of i cried,making the whole thing becomes more worse... i dun wan to bother you just bcoz of this small matter...i hope dat hui yun read the paragraphs above,n hope dat everything will b ok again...i feel dat i'm a trouble-maker...i haf neva given u such a big headache,but now..making you disappointed n i am the first student hu makes you upset...u must be detest me a lot...if i were you...i dun even bother bout it cos i'm not a good student at all...SRY,SRY,SRY!!!i wanna try to solve the problem btwn us,n dun wan you to get upset again...apologising sincerely...sry...

this message is for every1 hu comfort me:
ppl....i wanna sae thx...i find dat i'm very unbearable...i cried,i do things to make u all worry...i'm very selfish...i onli think bout myself..i forgot dat u ppl oso have your own problems...but u all helped me,telling me dat it's onli a misunderstanding,which there's no a nid to make a big fuss over it...i feel very sry...i cried not just bcoz of hui yun onli...so ppl,pls dun blame her...she's pitiful enuf...she nids frens...dun just bcos of this,thinking dat she's the 1 hu makes me cry,n ignore her....she needs concern too...


I FEEL DAT I WAS A THORN IN EVERY1'S EYES,N NOT HUI YUN...I CRY OVER SUCH A SMALL THING WHICH MAKE U ALL MISUNDERSTOOD HUI YUN...DUN BLAME HER...IT'S NOT HER FAULT...I PLEAD FOR HER FORGIVENESS...N HOPE DAT EVERYTHING GOES RITE AGAIN...SRY MR LAU,SRY PPL N VERY SRY TOWARDS HUII YUNN...
4:28 AM
Y.JIXIN says.




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